How to start working with me [for individuals]
When you get in touch with me, you might be clear about what you want. You might want a tantric massage, for example, or learn about The Wheel Of Consent, or just talk and explore. In that case, all we need to do is to have a telephone or Zoom conversation so I can clearly know what you want and we can both decide if we’re a good fit to work together, then we can just arrange our first working session. I generally suggest that if we’re doing bodywork, before starting work with me, you also visit me in my studio for an informal, free chat, so we can meet face to face and you can see where we’ll work. I find that contributes to a sense of safety and connection, which is a very good foundation for working together. But it’s not essential; it’s up to you.
But in my experience, most people rather than wanting something specific from me have a sense of the issue they want to address; lack of pleasurable sensation say, or lack of confidence, but are not sure what the work between us will look like. Or, they may just be intrigued by the possibility of exploring their sexuality, but not know where to start. The best way forward if this is you is a free conversation, ideally in person, but otherwise by Zoom or phone.
To orient you, I find it helpful to categorise my work with individuals in three ways:
Awakening the body to pleasure and discovery
This is for you if:
-you just want to have a loving, sensual experience or
-you feel a bit disconnected from your body sometimes and want to explore and expand your capacity for pleasure and discovery or
-you are suffering from something which substantially interferes with your happiness: for example, an apparent inability to orgasm, or an inability to relax because of bad past experience
If this, or something like this is you, just get in touch with me, we arrange a free in person, telephone or Zoom conversation and then we can arrange your first session
We will always agree everything in advance and go at your pace
Sex Coaching
You may have a specific issue which you need some help with, for example
-lack of confidence, experience or knowledge
-a non judgmental space where you can be free to talk
-learning new skills
-exploring the various aspects of sexuality
Again, please just get in touch with me, we can arrange an in person, telephone or Zoom call, talk over the options and then arrange your first session.
Bespoke
As far as the Bespoke option is concerned, this is important because lot of the time I find that people are uncertain about what they might want from me. They can describe the issue -boredom with sex, lack of confidence or pleasure, body shame, inability to orgasm, for example – but they are uncertain about what’s needed to resolve it. And that’s not surprising. In our sex lives, we’re notoriously confused. Which is made worse by often thinking of our situation in unhelpful psychological terms [“I have attachment issues”] or that there’s something wrong with me [“why do I not know how to do this?” “why am I not like everyone else?”], or that we have trauma, rather than “How can my deep need for pleasure and connection be met?”.
If you know what you want to change, but don’t yet know how, I find it helpful to work like this:
You contact me and we arrange an in person, telephone or Zoom conversation. Please budget for at least 40 minutes for this[which is free], as I want to get a good sense of the issues.
After that initial conversation, we will arrange a one hour in depth Exploratory Session, which is chargeable, and where I will give you an outline of the various ways in which we could work together, and we can talk about these in depth, decide what works best for you, then arrange future sessions. To get the most from the session, I will ask you, at your option, to fill out a detailed questionnaire which will enable us to start from an informed position.
You can contact me here
Back to HOME
